Sunday, April 27, 2008

The Hike

We went for a hike on Portola Redwoods State Park to be among the dark green leaves that were inviting me yesterday. The first hour of the hike was merely a joke. We just stepped a few 100 feet. My A was fascinated with the woods, the wood sticks, pines on the ground, dirt, stones, river, ... . And was hardly moving. So after an hour of a somewhat idle walk we sat on a bench and had our lunch. After which we hikes another few miles but A was mainly carried by M and partly carried by me. It was lots of fun hiking with a 23 month old. And by the time we were sure we were the coolest parents to take our baby son for a hike in the woods there came a couple with an even younger baby in a shoulder carrier!
Oh! And yes! We are reaching that time of the year again: A's second birthday! He is growing up. Let's face it. He is going to be a grown man one day, God willing. He wont be "my" man then, or ever. He is always my A.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

A Saturday

Sitting in the library behind a study desk by the window to prepare for my presentation for my course, I gaze at the distant mountains. A mild fog and then dark green bushes on the whole mountain skirt is inviting. Closer to the building there are taller trees. Fresh green leaves, dark red leaves, and palm trees. I realize once more that I have started liking and enjoying Northern California. The sun is still too bright for me here and I still enjoy cloudy days better, but there is beauty. And I like this beauty.
It was about three weeks after the new year, when we had a lunch gathering with Iranian colleagues from other branches in Bay Area to celebrate the new year. I was sitting in MS's van while we were driving to the restaurant. Gazing out of the car window I watched the green grass on the road premises, and the wildest wild flowers in terrain. And that was my very first realization of the beautiful California.
Spring makes every thing prettier I believe.

Sunday, April 20, 2008


یک مصاحبه با یک خبرنگار عراقی که از عراق برگشته بود...

Blog: Inside Iraq


خیلی احساس میکنم که این مادر را میفهمم!

به نظر من زمان جنگ در دنیا گذشته است. اما جنگ نه تنها ادامه دارد، جنگها هنوز در پیشند... تاریخ تکرار میشود؟ یا انسان نادانتر؟

Friday, April 18, 2008

Interesting life

We were throwing a congratulatory lunch party for a colleague (AA) who is leaving to Hawaii tomorrow to get married by the end of the next week. I was sitting at the table with another colleague (VM) who is originally from Iraq. We started chatting and I was trying to memorize some Spanish phrases he was trying to teach me(he speaks Spanish); then one thing led to another and finally I found myself telling him about my dream (actually nightmare) last night.
When I woke up I found my whole body aching and all my muscles tense. In my dream there were military planes dropping bombs on the city I was in. I had experienced similar events in real life, being in Iran during the 80s, only I was a kid back then and in my dream last night I was the mom I am, trying to find a shelter for my A! I was then remembering my parents, and all those staying in Iran during the bombardment days and weeks and months, sleeping in the basement, the whole family, and listening to my father telling "Nokhodi"'s stories, and me listening to the sound of the military planes, the sound of the bombs exploding somewhere, and then thinking about my classmate who was crying in the school shelter that same day when the siren invited us all there, then imagining the cry of a baby were the bomb hit and scream of mothers and fathers. I was afraid of the lizards too, who resided in the basement. We were kids. Pure kids. And they were mothers and fathers. Sheltering us under the roof they shared with us. One for all and all for one? Was that the motto? I am amazed how they and we survived all that. And I was telling VM, an Iraqi, about this all ...
VM's life is really like a story itself I should tell you bits and pieces I know in another post may be, God willing.

Sunday, April 13, 2008


Green grapes; AC's cool breeze; ... Is it summer already?
It has been a really hot weekend. It is supposed to cool down again for the week to come.
We went for a two hour hike yesterday. Loved the green! Fresh. New. Crisp. Loved the wild flowers, orange, purple, and white.
M is cooking us some thing for lunch. The only ingredient I wanted to be in the dish was mushrooms. I hear the sound of sizzling veggies and the spoon banging the skillet. Cannot wait to see and taste it. It smells good.
A is walking in the apartment, singing, talking to himself, and pushing his bigger cars. Playing with himself for a change and not bugging either of his parents for a change to read to him, paint with him, or just be with him while he plays.
I have decided on my assignment. I have a new idea I need to act upon.
I have been thinking about my friends who are near and dear in my heart. I am in contact with them mainly via e-mail. I don't find myself missing them though. They are with me. And I enjoy their company, the thought of them being my friend and spending the time to write to me. I feel their positive thinking towards me and that energizes me.
Life is full of harmonies. There are times for chaos too. I am just enjoying this time of alignment.
It is a nice Sunday!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

You do the math

“275,000” homes were destroyed during Hurricane Katrina”
“There are 50,000,000 people without health insurance in the States”
“With the price of a pair of shoes you can change lives”

“The cost of the war in Iraq has been $3,000,000,000,000”.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

بودن در اینجا و حال

چند روز بود که این فکر توی ذهنم غوطه ور بود که امروز میم عزیزم دقیقا به همین نکته اشاره کرد. اینکه دوران نوجوانی و مخصوصا اول جوانی به طرز عجیبی میگذره. هر قدر هم بهت بگند که الان از هفت دنیا آزادی باورت نمیشه و به نظرت همه چیز زیادی مهم میاد. ولی الان که نگاه میکنه انگار حیفت میاد. میگی کاش بهتر گذرونده بودم.

مشکلات داشتیم، نه که نداشتیم. از مدرسه و معدل و کنکور بگیر تا خود دانشگاه و دوستیها و انتخاب همسر و محک زدنهای مخصوص اون دوران. الان که نگاه میکنی انگار اونموقع هیچ مساله ای واسه حل کردن نبود و تازه مشکلهای اساسی شروع شده!

اخیرا یک تعبیر تازه از دنیا و زندگی رو دارم سعی میکنم که درک کنم: انگار عقل جزیی ناگزیر از تجربه این خطاهاست. این تعبیر رو چند روز پیش خوندم. از اون لحظاتی بود که یکباره کتاب رو کنار میگذاری. مکث میکنی، و بعد یک لبخند از قلبت میاد و به لبت میشنه که هوم...

"جهان خلق عالمی است محکوم به حکم زمان و مکان و حالات غیر ارضی مدت و امتداد، حالاتی که از قوه خیال بشر بیرون است. این جهان همواره در ماضی و مستقبل و در «آنجا» است و هرگز حال و حاضر و «اینجا» نیست. حضور و حضرت مختص حق است و مجمع ازل و ابد که منزه از همه آفات زمانی و امور ممتده است و در عین حال مدت و امتداد را در بر گرفته و در آنها ساری است، نه فقط اول هر اولی است بلکه آخر هر آخری است." عارفی از الجزایر/ مارتین لینگز؛ ترجمه نصرا... پورجوادی- ص 130

یا حق!

هفده بدر

رفتیم هفده به در! با فامیل و دوستان و دوستانشون و دوستانمون. خوشحالم که ایرانیم و سنتی دارم که درش روح تازه طبیعت رو جشن میگیریم هر سال.

دوستان قدیمی از تورنتو پیشمون بودند. آخرش اونی که از قبل میشناسی یک چیز دیگست! یک جنس دیگست. نتیجه اینکه اونی که امروز شناختی رو مغتنم بدون چون فردا همون میشه از یک جنس دیگه!

آرمان از اینکه سنگ بندازه توی دریاچه و به قلپ صداش گوش بده خیلی خوشش اومده بود.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008


Have a happy and joyful "Nature's Day" you all!
It has been a good year so far. Unexpected good surprises have come our way and I am optimistic about a nice year ahead. There are also new thought coming to my mind, new visions if you will; I am finding the life moving fast forward. There is a beauty in it: there is nothing too serious to hold on to. It will pass, sooner or later. And at the end of the end there is returning to the beginning. Which is all nice. I am grateful for life!
Have a happy and peaceful year!