Monday, April 25, 2011


All at once it seems all is getting fussy.  May be it has been always fussy and what is happening is actually clarifying the fussiness.

I am trying to be less ego driven, I am trying to be aware of my ego and people's ego and societies' ego and religious group's ego and nation's ego.  But in the end, I am responding to them all.  I am living their rights and wrongs.  I feel buried, unrealized, unsatisfied, untrue.

I am told I write vaguely, that I have lots to say but I do not say it after all.  Now I am trying to write.  Just saying.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Toronto Trip

It is Monday morning and we are all flying back to San Francisco. This time I made it here with both M and A; it was such a positively different trip. It was calming to get to the hotel from a full day of work in a different city and rejoin my family.

The trip was initiated in the business mode. We worked both on Wednesday and Thursday meeting our valued customers in the familiar city of Toronto and also in London, ON. It was nice to travel on 401 again all the way west and get to go to London. It was actually noticeable how there were many white and blond people in Toronto, relatively more so of California we thought.

I was working with my colleague B.O. who is our territory manager in Ontario. I liked her very much actually. She had a very interesting perspective of life and herself, very intriguing personality to me actually.

We got to a mellower mode on Friday and totally on vacation mode over the weekend visiting a few old friends. It was really nice and happy to be with them again. Most of the couples now had young kids. They all seemed to me more mature, calmer may be, more settled even, possibly more focused. I saw them all as they were years before, not much changed, more or less the same vibes as they used to have except with modified and moderated intensity. Just a quick observation.

Meeting their new kids was endearing and thought provoking to me. I knew their parents but not them. In the very short time I had with them they seemed different from their parents yet resembled them.

It snowed at the very last night. We were particularly excited because A got to see snow as he was eagerly anticipating that. It was too late at night for him to make a snow man but he got to write his name on the fresh snow with his finger. He showed his frozen finger to me post carrying a tiny ball of snow melting on his finger tip.

All in all it was wonderful to be back, meet our old friends in the new year, and this time with my family too!