Friday, May 30, 2014

A Traveller's Longing

Business trips can be really lonely.  Sitting in airplanes alone, walking in airports rushing through, dining alone, missing calls and not the tying the time to chat.
I feel lost tonight. My flight got cancelled and they reroute us with much longer trip time. I will get home past midnight enshala and I haven't seen my kids a whole day. I miss then so bad.

Monday, May 26, 2014


How I felt the first time I met him. Curled up; closed eyes; wide open mouth, crying. Overwhelmed with birth I suppose.  I cried too, overwhelmed with a newly discovered love that suddenly filled up my whole being.

Today he is a big kid. Not quite a little man yet.  Oblivious to the world and immersed in his little world. Not much curled up anymore.  He is walking upright now. Eight years has passed. I watch him grow...

I know I have grown with him; I still feel like a student in the parenthood class.  Everyday a new challenge. Everyday a new joy. Everyday a new exam.  I receive more failed points I feel than well-done awards. I'm praying.  I pray for the good in the world to always be with him!

Happy 8th Birthday my little boy! Mommy loves you! Always and always...

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Dawn of a Miracle

I believe in dreams. Miracles happen.

Friday, May 16, 2014

To Teach What Was Never Mastered

I took the kids to the park yesterday.  It was the first time the little angel was sitting in a sandbox.  She seemed amused by the texture and feel of sand. Took her a few minutes to get acclimated and feel at ease. Finally she started exploring around, pulled a toy truck toward herself and started toying around, occasionally grabbing a fist full of sand letting it dripple down her fingers.
My sunny son went right to business, bringing over all the trucks, putting them in line and digging out sand to be carried by the trucks.
In the mean time a little boy, may be 3 or 4 years old, stepped into the sandbox. Very calmly and rightfully he came over and took two of the trucks my son was playing with. His dad noted that he had to share to which in broken words he responded "this is mine".  He toddled away with the trucks all the while looking back at my son as if anticipating a reaction. My son was just looking at him in disbelief I suppose.  The little boy played with the trucks for two minutes or so and finally left them there and climbed out of the sandbox. At this point A came out of his trans and continued playing.
I wish I told him to feel free to share but feel free to speak up for yourself too.
I feel like I'm playing in the adult version of a sandbox in a day to day basis. People claiming my work. People leaving me in trans by acting so rightfully and knowingly selfish. People doing the wrong and anticipating the right.   People reacting childishly to another's attention and immediately calling for attention towards themselves.  People ruling around in their unruly mannerism.  People so territorial yet protesting anyone's right to their work labeling them as uncollaborative.  And people like me.  Speechless and baffled by their selfish unfair behavior.
I wish I had learned to speak up when I was playing in a sandbox. And now I wish to teach what I never mastered.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Happy Mother's Day

My little angel has been sick with a cold. We had a very restless sleepless night last night. Morning arrived way too fast after the relative calm at around 4:30am. It was nonetheless awesome to wake up to the gift extended to my face by my sunny son.  Now with a pounding headache I'm smiling to the joys of the day.
I love Mother's Day! Even with a sick baby! Moms smiling and kids a tad more grateful for a few hours.  May God give Grace to all moms and kids!